Fuck Uncle Roger. Fuck the exactly six jokes he repeats in every video. I am tired of even thinking about Uncle Roger, so after all that he needs to go and fuck himself.

a short poem.

And then she’s erupting with laughter, too. And we’re hunched over. It’s not the time. It’s the worst time for this. But we always said we were dumber together. “Imagine if we could go back and tell our freshman selves that we’d end up here,” I say. I flap my hand towards the burning sky, the chasm in front of us. The absurdity of it all.

Unfortunately, we did not foresee a lot of things: 1) the fact that we’re extremely lactose intolerant, 2) the fact that matcha has caffeine and it’s late in the day, and 3) the fact that trying the same matcha products three times was bound to get us a little sick of matcha.

The past two years of Chinese rule have seen thousands of settlers arrive in Taiwan from all different regions of the mainland. Their clothes and their languages are varied, but something in their eyes always looks the same. For this, they believe, is their land, and they will take what they want from it.

I’m a senior. And like all seniors — senior citizens included — we spend a lot of time reflecting on our pasts. So let me be maudlin for a second. Let me tell you what I’d wish I’d known entering CMU. What I wish I could tell everyone here: I know. I was there. Perhaps I was in deeper than everyone else. Perhaps it was just me. But for that sliver of chance that someone else is in the same place I was in — this is for you.